TELEVISION COVERAGE ONBOARD ms AMSTERDAM

• So, you’re at sea and there’s little to do onboard the ship (unless you just love watercolors, bridge, bingo).  Surely, you can sit back in your room and watch television?  Not so fast . . .
• Here’s HAL’s television line-up:
• Channel 26 (“HAL TV”):  HAL infomercials (e.g., trying to sell you DVD’s of the cruise)
• Channel 27 (“In Port”):  HAL infomercials (trying to sell you their shore excursions)
• Channel 28 (“Shopping”):  HAL infomercials (trying to sell you their jewelry)
• Channel 29:  CNN
• Channel 30:  HAL infomercials (trying to sell you future cruises on HAL)
• Channel 31 (CN):  Cartoons
• Channel 32 (TCM):  Old movies, often in black and white
• Channel 33:  ESPN
• Channel 34:  HAL infomercials (“Barbara” talks about travel destinations)
• Channel 35:  HAL infomercials (streaming ad for “On Deck for the Cure”)
• Channel 36 (Comedy):  Ostensibly a channel with comedy movies, but they play the same movie over and over followed by even more HAL infomercials!
• Channel 37 (Drama):  Same with drama movie (singular)
• Channel 38 (CTV):  HAL infomercials (its “chef”)
• Channel 39:  Fox
• Channel 40:  HAL’s navigational information (picture showing where the ship is on a map)
• Channel 42:  HAL infomercials (ads for the casino)
• Channel 43:  Elevator music
• Channel 44:  A picture of the front of the ship
• This is what we’ve had to “entertain” us for the last 70 days!  I’ve missed an entire season of American Idol!  I can’t watch any of my favorite shows – none of them!  Imagine that!  I recall a HAL officer told Bill week one that he couldn’t watch the NFL playoff games, because “this isn’t an American cruise line – we don’t have ABC, NBC, CBS!”  Most of the passengers onboard are from America.  I wondered why the man had such an anti-American attitude, right out of the gate.
• HAL’s broadcast system loses satellite connection on a regular basis, meaning there is nothing to watch but the HAL infomercials, which stream the same material over and over, and over again.  It’s maddening sometimes!
• We’re almost forced to go to the casino, so we have something to do!  But we’ll lose $100 to $200 within about 15 to 30 minutes, since these machines are so tight.  Then, it’s back to the room for more HAL infomercials.  Aye!!
• They will let you check out movies, one at a time, for one day only.  They have older movies, which we’ve already seen.
• There are 43 days left until we return “home” . . . but who’s counting?